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10/22/2005: "An other rejection"

music: BBC One
mood: Somewhere halfway

Hiya all,

It has been a while again, for which I apologise. However it is just because either nothing much happens or I get too depressed just thinking about it.

Angela has had a rejection again this week, even after everything looked so promising. She had two interviews with via an agency and everyone was really positive about her. But then the big boss of the company suddenly decided they would have to move people around and a deal was off.
It made me feel really depressed and I cried my eyes out Thursday evening. This because I just don't know when things will start looking up for us again, workwise.
My job ends the 31st of October and I still don't have anything else. On top of that I am still not sure whether I will get unemployment benefit or when I will have an other job. As now things are already difficult they might get much worse even. I am just not sure what is going to happen: will I be able to celebrate my birthday in January (my 30th)? Will I be able to sit my CAE exam in June? Will there still be money for that? Will I ever see Newbury again? I so long for it, but still: there is no money. When will we be able to see Marija again, or our English friends?
I just don't know what will happen or how low this hole is. My feeling is that we are not even so far in it and, on the other hand, it feels like we are already too deep in it.

I am just glad that Angela and I are together. At least that is the main thing in life, I guess. I know money doesn't make you happy, but it does help with having less problems.

Well, that's it for now.

I'll write something more later.

Jacqueline