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09/04/2005: "I hate myself"

mood: Very very disappointed at myself

Just before I start doing something which I should have done already I just wanted to get rid of this: I have disappointed myself and other badly again this weekend, it's like I never learn.

Why can't I change? What is so difficult for me in respect to acting like a normal adult? I seem not to get it at all and this weekend was one of the worst to date.
It's all about priorities and I had them badly wrong again.
I won't go into detail, but suffice to say that I hate myself at the moment. That's why I will start working now as otherwise I hate myself even more.

Jacqueline